And now, back to our (childhood) show

Well, Purim has come and gone, although Adar has a few days left. Last week was hectic preparing for everything, so I want to make it up with a blast from the past with a modern twist.

Of late Hollywood has rediscovered the cartoons of Saturday Morning -- Bullwinkle, George of the Jungle, Underdog, Thunderbirds, Bugs Bunny (although its arguable that Bugs has been forgotten). While the big screen versions have not lived up to Hollywood's expectations, the trailers are kinda cute and amusing:

There's no need to fear!

UNDERDOG is here!

Watch out for that tree!

King of jungle, here to help


Watch me pull a rabbit outta my hat


Simon! THEODORE! ALLLLLLVIN!!!


You're dethpicable

Another "Twofer"

It's been kinda hectic here with the run up to Purim this week, so I've not been as diligent as I want about the "Be happy it's Adar" series. I'm working on it.

Would you believe it is hard to find examples of Jewish women singing? Perhaps it goes back to the prohibition on Kol Isha, hearing a woman's voice singing, that many observant Jews adhere too. (The prohibition only applies to live works, not recorded ones if I understand things correctly).

Well, past generations had Barbra Streisand and then Bette Midler....

..today we have Paula Abdul

I want to revisit a subject from a few weeks ago, where a beagle named Champion K-Run's Park Me in First (better known as Uno) charmed the audience and judges at the Westminster Dog Show and won Best in Show, a first for a beagle.

Well today, this clip about "Jerry" came across my news feeds. There's something surprisingly relaxing about watching this dachshund amuse himself.

Jerry needs no help to play "Fetch"

There is a reason....

...she is called The Divine Miss M! Ooooooooooo baby! Three today, since I neglected to post before Shabbat...

Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy


Kiss My Brass!


Bette and Dolly. Or Dolly and Bette...

Hellllllllllllo

DOLLY!

I lift my lamp...

...beside the golden door.

Two Jews work a Chabad telethon....

Only in America...

Kinky Friedman and Bob Dylan

SCIENCE!

I always did like the Thomas Dolby song, but long before that and the movie Weird Science, there was Math. Or more correctly, New Math. And this possibly recognizable tune.

And you wonder why there is still a Tom Lehrer section in large music stores?

Who is Arthur Orchowsky?

This week I thought I would focus on Jewish musicians, and I want to start with a distant cousin of mine. Orchowsky was a big band leader and oboe player of note in the 30s.

We more commonly know him as Artie Shaw.

And for your listening pleasure...

A Night at the Opera and...


a Day at the Races.

More wordplay...

Or horseplay.

Or you could just play the horn...

You's got nuttin on me!

You're not the law...

Hooray I must be going (oh wait, that was yesterday)

Someone DID call him shnorrer!

Of course he prefers hunting elephants in Alabama...

...because the tusk are loosa...

Inflation explained...

You go uraguay, and I'll go mayaguez....

Did someone call him schnorrer?

And for my next segue....

Have you ever been hit by a coconut pie?

But can you imitate Maurice Chevalier?

Of course by the same token, there is something to be said for reinvention...

It must have been about twenty years ago, a young upstart cable network aimed at, well, young'ems that start up with whomever (presumably their parents mostly) reinvented getting a pie in the face. And thus Nickelodeon begat

GREEN SLIME!

From the Famous

To the Not So Famous

Shabbat Shalom!

Oh watch out where the huskies go; Don't you eat that yellow snow...

Everything old is new again...

Love, as they say, is wasted on the youth. Fortunately, they have enough sense to watch old Three Stooges clips...

How Suite It Is!

TAXI!

Drive me off this picture...

Yankee Bean Soup, Coleslaw, and Tuna Surprise -- Kaching!

Keep your eye on the pie...

I'm amazed they did this shot without Tony Curtis getting hit.

Brandy! More Brandy!

Doin' a what comes naturally.

This is actually part of a set of clips from Moe Howard's 1970's appearance on the Mike Douglas Show, and in one of the earlier clips, he talked about Curly's physical gestures and humor -- the running of his hands over his face, getting down on the floor and spinning in circles for example.

As it turned out, Curly would forget his lines. These acts of his were a way of him buying time to remember them without interrupting the take!

Regardless, even after forty years, Moe still has it. And Ted Knight gets it.

Deep thought for Parshah Ki Tisa

By way of background, Ki Tisa is notable for two things: First and formost, the story of the Golden Calf is told here, and the second is the instructions on the census, where every Jewish male 20 years and older, regardless of their wealth (or poverty), had to give half a shekel.

We learn a number of things here, but one thing in particular is that we are not individually whole, that we are but half, and must be with another in order to complete ourselves. In a sense, this first reading (which reviews the census) itself reinforces this.

This reading is 41 sentences long, and twice that is 92, which in turn is written as Tzadek-Bet. I would suggest that there is an underlying reinforcement that we must have two Tzadeks, wise men, from which we learn, that when two wise men review Torah and reach a consensus, then there is some underlying assurance they have reached a correct reading of Torah.

Shavuah tov!

3.14159265

What? You thought I was going to resort to math humor? [Although if anyone can find something funny about 2.71828183, power to 'em!] Regardless, these three did it first, and they did it the best.

Why I oughta...

The Beagle Has Landed

I actually wanted to do this last week, but I preferred Sid Caeser and Milton Berle.

First Charlie Brown wins out over both Underdog and Stewie in Coca Cola's memorable ad from this year's Super Bowl, and now "K-Run's Park Me in First", better known as Uno, has avenged Snoopy after all the losses to the cursed Red Baron -- last week, for the first time, the Westminster Kennel Club awarded "Best In Show" to Uno. Beagles are tremendously popular dogs and in this clip from the Associated Press, the audience certainly affirms this, and Uno seems happy about it as well:

RELEASE THE HOUNDS!

I'd also like to play tribute to what has to be the most famous beagle in the world

CURSE YOU RED BARON!!!

Shabbat Shalom everyone, see you Motzi Shabbat!

Who knew?

Frum Hillbillies!

They do look like your friendly neighborhood Chassidic Rabbi...

Fyvush Finkel, Itzhak Perlman, and Red Buttons walk into a Klezmer DVD

Priceless

Gonzo gets the last laugh...

As a companion to yesterday's clip of Sid Caeser, here is Milton Berle. And Statler and Waldorf. And Gonzo.

Woka-woka-woka!

In The Beginning...

...there was Milton Berle and Sid Caeser. The impact these two had on comedy cannot be understated. Caesers writers included Mel Brooks, Carl Reiner, Neil Simon, Woody Allen, and others, led by Mel Tolkin.

Today's clip is of Caeser with Nanette Fabray. No translation needed.

No No Nanette!

I actually have an Uncle Martin...

...although he does not have antennae growing from the back of his head, nor can he make his spaceship levitate, nor does he even HAVE a spaceship.

Funny. He doesn't look like Ray Walston.

Ketchup catch up

Well, the great Cholent Competition was not to be. The Rabbi's brother will not be in town afterall. Well, at least not THAT brother. Another brother (and fellow Red Sox Nation member!) will be here however.

And in the "Strike Two" category, I couldn't get buffalo either, so instead, I made Brunswick Stew for the cholent.

What could be more perfect for Shabbat in Adar...

...then two videos about a Happiness Factory? (Or the inside story on that Coke machine on the corner.) Eat your heart out Pixar...

Part 1 (for Friday) -- The Happiness Factory Documentary

Part 2 (for Shabbat) -- Happiness Factory, The Movie

COIN IN THE HOLE!

Who? I don't know....

While there are many outstanding comics today, it all began with these two clowns...

THIRD BASE (You were expecting George Burns?)

And now for something completely different...

Who say's Jewish kids can't dance?

You were expecting maybe Monty Python? NI!

Strictly News...

...Strictly Kosher. Supervision by Aish Hatorah.

My parents met Dr. Rice if that helps.

Mick Jagger and Keith Richards should spin in their graves about this...

...of course there is this tiny problem that they're still alive.

Schlock Rock -- Purim 1991

Catch a wave, all caught up!

I've already put a snippet from Jay Leno's second "A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Minister" segment, with Rabbi Mendy Pellman, so to finish catching up with the Adar-a-palooza, here is Rabbi Levi Cunin from the first segment:

The Surfing Malibu Rabbi
(Don't forget to watch Rabbi Cunin and Rabbi Pellman chat afterwards, and Jimmy Kimmel's bit at the end)

The Shnowz Al stops here.

SILENCE!!!!

I keeeeeeel you!

(If you're not doubled over in laughter, you will be.)

Achmed -- The Dead Terrorist

Get. down. Boogie oogie oogie.

iFabrengen (even if it's an ad)

The Shnowz Al stops here...

Seeing as it is now Adar (OK, Adar I), I'm going to try and put up some amusing tidbit on a daily basis, maybe several today, since it is already 4 Adar I...)

Rabbi Mendy Pellin on Jay Leno

The Mendy Report on chabadtube.com or for you YouTube Fans, ChabadNewsOnline.

Game on man!

And in a bit of friendly competition, after my Beef Burgundy cholent this past Shabbat, my Rabbi's brother (also a Rabbi, just younger) wants to make the cholent this week. Now on the one hand, I suspect he may have made the comment in jest, because he's in Philadelphia during the week helping ANOTHER brother (and yes, he's also a Rabbi -- there are just way too many Rabbi Deitschs in my life!) in Philadelphia. Hmmm. Cincinnati Chili or Cinnamon Spiced Buffalo... (I had originally planned to do the chili, but maybe the buffalo is a better option...)

Deep thought for last week, 3 Adar I 5768

In this past week's parshah, Terumah, we're taught about the Mishkan -- the portable Tabernacle that Eretz Yisrael carried with them throughout the desert. In the course of this reading, there is the first mention of the showbreads -- these loaves of bread baked fresh each week and placed in the Tabernacle. The miracle of the showbreads is that when the old ones were replaced by the new ones, the old ones were still as warm and fresh for the Levites to eat, as they were the week before when they were first placed on the alter. There were twelve showbreads on the Tabernacle, and we remember this today on Shabbat by having two challahs, each with six braids, for a total of twelve braids.

Six Braid Challah

Now making a six braid challah isn't so hard. It takes some practice -- it's not as intuitive as a three braid challah. On the other hand, I noticed that it seems to come out "fuller" then the simpler three braid challah. This however got me to thinking. Can you make a single twelve braid challah? Well the folks at Black Widow Bakery have a pretty cool one!

A new option in Washington

Last Shabbat, I had the pleasure of being with a couple from Potomac, and they mentioned that there is a new option coming to the National Capitol area for kosher dining, the Pomegranat Bistro (see this article in the Washington Jewish Week). If you are familiar with the Washington DC area (and Lower Montgomery County in particular), the restaurant is located in the Cabin John Mall, at the intersection of Tuckerman Lane and Seven Locks Road (down the street from Chabad of Potomac, Beth Sholom, and Young Israel Ezras Israel). I made the point to stop by Cabin John Mall and the restaurant is clearly nearly completion -- the front part of the establishment has a take out counter with a refrigerated display case, while the rear is clearly a proper dining area. They are located between the Giant Food and CVS Pharmacy.

The same WJW article also mentions that Mama Leah's Gourmet Pizza, in the Koshermart Plaza on Boiling Brook Parkway has folded. Now while I do not happily view the demise of a kosher eatery, the area is fortunate that Sienna's is still going strong.

Deep thought for the week, 26 Shevat 5768

I will never be able to look at Ben and Jerry's the same way again.

In studying the parshah this week, I learned a couple things.

By way of background, this week's parshah, Mishpatim, is the first time in the Torah that the focus is not one a historical event, but rather upon Jewish Law. We know that when Hashem gave the Torah to Eretz Yisrael at Har Tzinai, the people responded "We will obey, and we will understand". This is reinforced in the parshah, as the first statutes that are presented and discussed focus on slavery, and from this we learn that we must approach observance in the same manner that a slave approaches a master (although I personally find the image of a disciple to a master as a more palatable image). It is not necessary for the slave to understand why the master says to do something, simply that the slave do so.

Regardless, Jews are prohibited from eating or even benefiting from animals that have been wounded (which is the actual meaning of the word treyf) and are expected to die of those wounds. Well, this really was not much of an issue until several years ago.

It seems that dairy farmers, in order to lower costs and increase production, started to give their herds feed that help stimulate the production of milk. The feed however had the side effect of causing a build-up of gases in the stomach and intestines of the herd, which left untreated, would prove fatal. Not good.

Fortunately, the treatment was very simple and straight-forward -- a catheter would be instered into a small incision in the stomach or intestines, and the gases would be vented out. Once the catheter is removed, the puncture would seal immediately, and the animal would be perfectly healthy. By and large, most Rabbis agreed that consequently, the animal would still be considered kosher, and fit for use. But not all.

A small number of Rabbis insisted upon a stricter adherance to the law, that while the animals would remain healthy, because they had been punctured in the abdomen, they were now and forever more treyf. Now the argument was hard to dissmiss, as it is absolutely correct. Consequently, milk that is marked Cholov Yisrael is guaranteed to have come from cows that have never been given this feed and thus never have been surgically treated as I described above.

Good news / bad news...

The good news is that I spent HOURS yesterday with all these beautful Jewish women, preparing for Shabbat!

The bad news is that they were all young enough to be my daughters!

Having worked out the logistics of preparing and making cholent for the shul last Shabbat (and having the congregation be surprisingly enthusiastic for the cholent I made, bland as I thought it was), this week was the first "real" cholent -- a Moroccan Dafina with Kouclas. I don't think Rabbi's house has ever smelled this good, with the Dafina and challah cooking at the same time.

Regardless, I've written about this on an adjunct web log -- Iron Cholent.

Deep thoughts for the week -- Yitro, 25 January 2008 / 18 Shevat 5768

There's this great union at work in this week's Parshah, Yitro.

Before this point, Eretz Yisrael never really said "Baruch Hashem" (Praise G-d) in the same way we do today. They had not been given Torah and while the prophets certainly knew and practiced the mitzvot in advance,the general population, not so much.

So here in Yitro, Moshe's father-in-law (Jethro, or Yitro) comes to the Israelites camped at Har Tzinai (Mount Sinai), and has Moshe come down to him. Later, Moshe himself is the vehicle for Hashem coming down to the Jewish people.

So before this point, the Jewish people are not able to bring Hashem down to their place, but afterwards, through the peformance of Mitzvot, they can do so! This is why places like Har Tzinai and other sites beforehand are not holy sites in the same sense as the Temple Mount, where mitzvot of all forms were performed, and thus embuing the site with Hashem's holiness.

And what is amazing about this is the role Yitro, a non-Jewish priest, has in all this! Yitro had studied and prayed before all the pagan idols and found them lacking.

When word spread of Hashem's deeds against Pharaoh, most of the ancient world trembled in fear. The exceptiosn were the Amalekites, which believed that Hashem was not really with the Jewish people, and their victory was a fluke, and Yitro, who understood the lesson here, that the Egyptians had sought to end the Jewish people through water (by drowning the first born) and how were then they themselves drowned pursuing the Jewish people. Yitro understood that Hashem is a just god, sought out his son-in-law Moshe, and joined with the Jewish people.

Shabbat Shalom!

What's the difference....

....between a garment district worker and an Associate Justice of the United States Supreme Court?

"One Generation" -- Associate Justice of the US Supreme Court and daughter of a garment district worker, Ruth Bader-Ginsburg

Rivkah Naveh bat Rochel Leah -- 11 Tevet 5768

Today I learned of the passing of a friend of mine -- Sylvia (Rivkah) Wonzer Holan. She was my own age -- 47 (~Oct 1960 to 20 Dec 2007)

I only know bits and pieces of her life. She was born and raised in the area around Barstow, CA, the daughter of a dairy rancher. It is from this background that she drew her online names -- LadyHills and TevyesDaughter (although I have no idea where she got Gefiltefish Assassin from!) At some point in her life, she moved to North Carolina and then Alaska where she raised a family. She divorced, moved to Indiana and worked for a time as a nanny, before finally settling in New Rochelle, NY.

She wrote the following of herself:

How aptly named the female child, Rivkah; of the earth and bound to the earth. Her very beginnings like the microorganisms that inhabited the very ground upon which she first took breath;

She too populated the hearts, minds and souls of all who knew her. Comely and fair of face, tresses aflame as the desert sunsets which marked her waking hours, gracefully awkward, elegant, refined. Fragile, delicate, gossamer winged, fleet of mind and foot a contemplative conundrum this decendant of Sarah, Rachel and Leah.

Innocuous, ingenuous, inoffensive, vulnerable, tranquil, contemplative conundrum. Rubics cube awaiting to be defragmented. Defenses guarded, certain, yet not. Absolved of care, youthfully charging ahead heedless of the abyss, and the craggy bottom below. Over and under, around and about, to and fro, discovering the woman, clinging to the child.

Back forty needs tending, the meadow of her soul is at rest. Silted and fertile her mind is tilled, nurtured with the written word, fact filled fertilization, old soul, wise beyond her years. Like those before her, she awaits, anticipating the freedom, caged bird, so bound to the earth, escape is futile.

Fences in constant need of repair, mending, renovating, making do, use it until you cannot use it anymore. Frugal of all but heart, smile that challenges the sun, lighting the hearts of foreigners, visitors and those familiar.

Head bent, heart full, words of Mothers in unfamiliar language, acrid smoke, graceful hands circling, two candles, two hundred forty eight, two hundred fifty two. Man and Woman, Groom and Bride, five hundred parts combined. Head now erect, eyes that shine, welcoming, serene, solace.

Obedient daughter, mitzvot and serene. Almah, na’arah, quiet, familial.

And this:

Everyone who knows me will tell you, "With Syl, what you see is what you get. Good of heart, compassionate, caring, intelligent, and always with a smile on her face." As for my opinion, I tend to think we can be our own worst critic, but I will give it a shot. I am witty, charming, creative, a bit of a perfectionist, forgiving, devout, honest and forthright. When I am passionate about a cause I can go for the jugular, but I do not fight, I speak softly and listen intently. With that said, I believe in respect, honesty and integrity. I enjoy trying new things, be it new ways of looking at life or new ways of enjoying it. I am a country girl at heart, a farmers daughter, clinging to my ways, a barrel racer, a bull rider. I have mucked stalls, bucked hay, driven combines, sometimes, I like horses better than people. If you look under that auburn hair, you will see a bit of a red neck, however, I do clean up very nicely. Sixteen years of Ballet have served me well as have deportment lessons. I have been a debutante and have lived a bit of a Jungian life. I have been told that my photographs show "the many sides of Syl" perhaps that is true. I look at them and I just see, Syl. I have been single for 9+ years and during that period I have given much thought concerning what I truly am seeking. I made a list and then I threw that list away a long time ago, realizing that everyone is different, and that I can learn and appreciate everyone for different reasons. However, I would like someone who is respectful, not only of himself, but of me and our relationship. Intelligence, honesty, compassion for others and always a gentleman. Someone who enjoys good conversation, dancing, music, travel and puts the toilet seat down. If you are looking for me you will find me where there is really good, live Blues. You may also have seen me at the local bookstore sitting on the floor with my nose in a book as you walked by...I am a voracious consumer of books, the sound of the initial crack of the spine, the smell of the ink on the page, what a delicious part of life that is...are you sitting there as well? We live in a time when it is not fashionable to worship, some consider the spiritual arrogance of contemporary man to be a stumbling block. Yet being Jewish allows the capacity to be in awe, to feel thankful, to know from where I come and define who I have become. To remain ever mindful that being Jewish is not just a faith, but a culture as well. I have realized that the words gratitude and humility go hand in hand with who I am, a descendant of a noble people.

Rest in Peace.

Teriyaki Marinade

So when I was at the market the other day to get the ingredients for the broth mentioned below, I also picked up a steak for dinner on Erev Shabbat. I have a homemade teriyaki marinade I use for the meat:

• 1 teaspoon salt
  
• ¼ cup dry red wine
• ¼ cup balsamic vinegar
• 1 tablespoon soy sauce
• 1 teaspoon honey

Throw everything into the blender for a minute or two. This will make enough marinage for a London Broil about 1½ pounds. Take the meat and tenderize it with a serrated tenderizer (beat the steak down to about ½ inch thick or so). Marinate for four to twenty-four hours in the fridge, turning (at least) once. Take the steak out about an hour in advance to bring it up to room temperature and then either grill or broil.

Soup is good food. Or at least broth.

So let's review. I am single. If I want to eat, I have to cook for myself. I like to eat well -- boring, tasteless food doesn't do anything for me, so I try to find ways to incorporate ingredients in an atypical manner. So this is the first in a set of occasional notes about what I've done in the kitchen.

Today's entry is Citrus-infused Chicken Broth, (ingredients -- Chicken, a carrot, an onion, cinnamon, ginger, salt, and either a Seville orange or a combination of OJ and Lime Juice)